"You can't stop clickin' 'bout me, writin' 'bout me, tweetin' 'bout me" goes your chart-topping single Swagger Jagger, Cher Lloyd (@cherlloyd). And you have a point. Ever since you snarled on to The X Factor a year ago, all hair and eyebrows, getting your swag on, you have been a hot topic in the Twittersphere.
Clashes with journalists, tantrums and teenage angst have all been part of the Cher Lloyd experience.
But it's not all bad. Sit down kid and I'll give you a few tips. Let's get this in CHECK.
Haters
Though your lyrics preach the importance of rising above those who seek to jag your swag, your online behaviour tells a different story ("I don't give 2 shits about you so called haters, leave my brats alone and watch us take over!"). There are few more skilled at dispatching internet haters than you. Whether it's a personal cuss ("Leave me alone you giant pube head!") or to the world at large ("i'm still here and for some of you shitheads thats disappointing! :)"), it's all good work, Lloyd. Gold star.
Perspective
So, you enter The X Factor and Simon Cowell likes the cut of your swag and even though you only come fourth you get a deal anyway. Then you record your album with Will.i.am (@iamwill) and it's all going brilliantly. Until, that is, your first single is leaked and everyone slags it off because it fuses angry white girl rap with a chorus of "Oh my darlin' Clementine". Your reaction: "I've never been this upset ever!" Really?
"If you wanted to hurt me you've done a great job." Oh come on.
"Please don't do this to me . . . I've been through enough this year." Hmmm.
Perspective, babe. Perspective.
Cheryl
If ever there were a celebrity that Twitter is crying out to welcome to its bossom, it is your mentor Cheryl Cole. Though she has an account set up (@cherylcole), Cheryl maintains Twitter silence. The X Factor USA sacking, Ashley and the new blond bob all need to be talked about. Have a word. You'll be a hero.
Lots of love
@scouserachel
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